Respect every person’s points of view, even if you don’t agree.
From this position you are much more likely to help someone if you respect them.
Arrogance will always undermine your thinking, so having a healthy respect for the other person’s point of view will ensure a balanced approach to decision making.
Respect underpins everything.
It is a lot easier to influence someone who respects you, and it is difficult to persuade others to do things if they don’t.
Don’t let the respect others have of you diminish, always behave according to your values and ethics.
What sort of relationships do you have with people? There are many forms ranging from formal contractual arrangements (contracts to do something… buy a house) to informal consensual contracts (meet up for a drink… sometime)
Either way is the flow of the relationship unambiguous? i.e does each party know what is going on?
Misunderstandings (and World Wars) arise from insufficent anlaysis of the type of contract/relationship that is being formed.
Similarly, be clear and direct what you want out people so that your wishes and desires are clearly communicated.
Understand what the other party is getting out of the arrangement and listen to the other person and respond when there is a mismatch in relationship perceptions.
Pick the right ‘contract’ that is appropriate for the relationship, whether it is formal and there are strict guidelines and timeframes, or informal where rules equally apply (turn up at the right place at the right time for that drink) .
Consideration of the other person’s point of view is more easliy attained when there are some guidelines in place no matter how formal the relationship.
If you have been brought up as Christian, you will be familiar with this principle. The usual interpretation of the phrase is to treat each other as you would like to be treated yourself.
However, consider this, the phrase goes beyond this slightly egocentric view. What it is actually saying is that you should treat other people as they would like to be treated; i.e in a way that pleases them. That way:
a) they will understand you better
b) they may even reciprocate this principle and you will understand them better
Don’t forget, not everyone has the same world view as yourself and therefore by seeing the world through other people’s eyes and having a flexible approach in treating people means you can get your message across much easier.
This is the old conundrum, is your glass half empty or half full? which is supposed to elicit whether you are an optimist or pessimist.
The trouble with this question is that it is constrained by the fact that there is a container and by definition a boundary to your thinking.
What about a world in which there is no glass and so there are no limits to optimism or pessimism? Mere physical boundaries should not exist when it comes down to personal characteristics as the world is what you make it.
A lot of Eastern Philosophy is going on in that last paragraph which makes the whole issue of what governs are thinking open to debate.
Many suceesful (and Western) business leaders have developed the ‘can do/think outside the box/paint the sky blue’ thinking which has it roots in this philosophy.
One thing is certain, if you believe there to be a boundary to your thinking there will be.
Mmmm… Eastern or Western Philosophy?
Enjoy the moment. Or, if you don’t enjoy the moment, find a moment that you do enjoy.
Have a go at this, it will teach you to live more frugally, and although it is seen as a physical exercise, which is not a bad thing, it also teaches you ethical and spiritual values.
You will hear the word ‘mindfulness’ in the classes and this will teach you to appreciate the here and now.
A surfeit of greed will lead to excessive risk taking with the inevitable correction being proportionately painful. The higher you go without weighing up how greedy you have become will mean the inevitable drop will be disastrous because you haven’t risk managed your parachute.
Bouncing back from personal criticism or misfortune is easier if you fundamentally believe you are correct. If this is not the case you have made a mistake and should admit it, best of all to yourself, then bounce back in a different direction.
This is the old metaphor for tackling a large task and dividing it into smaller pieces.
Let’s go with this metaphor and share the meal with other people. Throw in some unusual spices and generally yet to make the task interesting and interactive.