Thoughts for the Day

Anxiety

Learn to control your inner thoughts and reflect on why you are anxious.

Anxiety is contagious and therefore be on your guard you do not catch this from other people, or indeed transmit this yourself. An anxious mind cannot make good choices.

Listening 1

Are you a good listener? Here are some examples of what not to do

  • Ordering and Commanding
  • Warning and Threatening
  • Preaching and Moralising
  • Giving Solutions
  • Lecturing
  • Judging
  • Praising
  • Shaming
  • Interpreting
  • Sympathising
  • Questioning
  • Withdrawing
  • Humouring

Some of these you will think are examples of good listening. The important point to remember here is that if you want to be a Good Listener you must suspend your own ego and concentrate on what is being said. Don’t have a presumption that your beliefs and hence your replies are the only ‘true path to Enlightenment’.

A positive empathic approach is required as well as an open mind, remember, not everyone thinks like you!!

Multitasking

It is a fine line between achievement and failure.

Multitasking is fine provided you do not spread yourself too thinly.

Having many tasks in progress and not completing any of them will lead to frustration.

Make sure you continually review what you are doing and that they are achievable within the time frame you have set yourself.

Process

Love what you are doing and apply your talents to love the process of doing. The more you enjoy the process, the easier the goals become. If you don’t enjoy the process and the Now, make a change and enjoy something else.

language

Wittgenstein

‘All language is vague, so there is no such thing as truth or certainty

Style

There is no one style appropriate for every occasion. Learn to adapt your style to particular circumstances, but make sure you keep to your principle centered beliefs.

Thinking

Having an open mind is useful, using it well is better. The ability to think in a perceptive manner and use our minds and experiences for the good of others is what sets us apart from other animals. The ability to think and change your mind and continually express your curiosity drives your energy levels and exposes yourself to new experiences, causing you to think again.

Faults

Overlook faults in others and don’t dwell on them. Look at your own faults and eliminate them.

Listening 2

I hope you read Listening 1 which are bad examples of listening

Here are some good examples of listening:

  • Actually hearing what is being said.
  • Understanding why they are saying it.
  • Wanting to help the person solve the dilemma (see my ‘Problems’ thought).
  • Accepting that the other person has strong feelings about their point of view.
  • Letting the other person finish what they are saying.
  • Reflecting.
  • Acknowledging that there may be middle ground between to polar opposites.

Basically, understand what the other person is saying. Listen not only with your ears but examine the content/context and body language of what is being communicated.

Perfection

Tricky one this. On the one hand you don’t want to compromise your standards and have unacceptable, imperfect outcomes. On the other hand you are never going to achieve perfection.

We all have to learn to live in an imperfect environment, but we should all strive to achieve as near perfection as we are comfortable with. What this means is that we have to regulate ourselves, promote our own standards and stick with them.